How many times have I said, "I never want to be like that" or "I don't ever want to do things the way that person does them"? More times than I can count. But it's not enough for me to say I don't want to do something.
I can hate something---truly loathe an attitude or action---but if all I do is think about the fact that I don't want to do that same thing, I'm not doing enough. I need to proactively think through what I will replace it with. Otherwise with all my mental space focusing on what I don't want to do, when I find myself in that situation, that very thing is probably going to be my first reaction.
Instead, I need to think about what I should do in its place.
I need to take more time to process through the things I've seen and experienced that I dislike and that I swear I don't want in my own life. I need to take it one step further and discover for myself what I will replace those things with, by using common sense, God's Word, and the input of those I trust and respect.
It's not enough to just say "I'll never do that!" I need to determine what I will do.